PathToHoliness

I’ve always been competitive and in many ways like sports, jobs and businesses I have started. Currently my wife and I are nearing 20 years with our current business. We started it and created work for client companies that no one else was doing. Our work involves photography, audio interviews, some video and all to assist in marketing efforts for these companies and most of that involved significant travel. We’ve worked for many of the largest names in agriculture. A big part of what we “pioneered” was the use of blogs, podcasts and social media. But that has all changed in the last 10 years as we started getting competition and now everyone is an influencer, content creator, digital marketing expert . . . This has had a big impact on us, not counting the cost of COVID, although that was a rough time financially.

So, I point this out because for the first time in my life I’ve felt down, depressed and have lost my enthusiasm. I’ve prayed about this and asked God for what He wants of me, of my company, of my “retirement.” I’ve been receiving answers. Most recently being the realization that a lot of my mental attitude is the result of comparing myself to others. Things like new jobs they have, growth in their companies, the fun they’re having in their retirement, their ability to do more exercise. A majority of this comes from seeing and reading this via social media. What was once a core of our work has, in my opinion, become not only a sewer pit of trash, but something that you not only can’t trust is reality or is the constant barrage of people posting about how wonderful they are and how successful (they think) they are. It’s easy to get caught up in that.

So, after about 3 days earlier this week I just felt deflated, no interest in anything, struggling to do things that have to be done, tired and finding myself just staring at the wall in my office. But then it really hit me out of no where it seemed that I’m doing this to myself and it is on one else’s fault. I’m not perfect. I’m not the best photographer. I’m not the best business man. I’m 65 and feeling older and yet trying to do everything I have done for over 40 years in my career. That’s crazy and I thank Jesus for opening my eyes to this. It has not been easy and I doubt I’m out of the woods yet. Although I hope to be in the woods next month for deer season!

I will also add the value of being able to talk to my wife and partner about this. She is pretty no nonsense and comes right to the point. She probably doesn’t know how important that is to me. But it is and since we are married, that includes Jesus as part of that union. It hasn’t been easy to talk about how I have been feeling. I’ve always struggled with some level of anxiety but it was never as bad as the last year.

If you or anyone you know has this kind of feelings or situation I hope you can find a way out of it. I only share this because I hope it might help someone. I have no idea what the next year will bring, much less the rest of this year. But as Saint Padre Pio would say, “Pray, Hope and Don’t Worry.”

BTW. The picture is from a weekday Mass I attended in Springfield, IL at Sacred Heart Church which is run by the St. Katharine Drexel Catholic Parish.

This week my Knights of Columbus council held its monthly meeting. I am currently the Lecturer for the council. So, I provide information for the good of the order on a variety of topics. This week my conscience required me to say the following as my report. This is an edited version, and we had a good discussion following it. So, here it goes.

I must point out the obvious first, which is that the devil is alive and well in the world and he is causing some of the worst atrocities we’ve ever seen.

So firstly, let’s start with abortion. It is a major issue we as Knights work on. That is to save the unborn. Don’t dwell on it and how many have been murdered because it will just drive you crazy.

That leads us to the main thing I want to bring up which is the vaccines for this Covid virus. I have been traveling quite a bit lately and have had many people asking me lots of questions about this topic. Many of those conversations were uncomfortable because people are so emotional about the issue.

My wife, Cindy and I are trained journalists by college and career. We’ve done lots of research since March, 2020 on this topic. We’ve never seen such a convoluted mess of misinformation and lies. And what really rankles us as Catholics is how the vaccines have been created, tested, and produced. All of them have used fetal tissue from what was originally tissue from an aborted baby. A long time ago at this point. They basically clone it to make it simple to explain how they continue that “line” of tissue. Only one uses fetal tissue in the actual production process and that is the J&J one regardless of what you may have heard. That’s why the bishops have had a real problem with that one. However, all the vaccines we have come about because of an aborted baby’s tissue. The fact that it was ever used encourages other researchers to use that kind of tissue and that should be illegal everywhere in the world.

We know what the Pope and bishops have said. Many bishops will not endorse any of their use. But the majority have told us we can feel okay to get the shots. If you’re familiar with the term remote cooperation, then you might understand how they can allow this. Look it up if you don’t know.

Read the rest of this post…

As we continue to live under stay at home orders of various kinds and locations I have been thinking more and more about the damage to people’s emotions, especially those who suffer from depression and anxiety. I’m concerned about our loss of jobs and liberties too.

But before you think I don’t care about every human life I can assure you nothing could be further from the truth. However, we live with death around us everywhere in the world. Abortion is the most extreme example. Terrorism, suicide, vehicle crashes and a variety of diseases like heart disease and cancer, are not new.

I don’t even pretend to be an “expert” on this COVID-19 virus as so many proclaim loudly on social media. But, the more and more data I see and hear make me doubt that our governments have made a good decision to essentially shut us down. Even experts who are doctors contradict each other.

I’m not afraid of the future though, because of my faith in Jesus. But besides the people who have died of this virus I am also concerned about all the people who are now un-employed, the businesses who are out of business or soon will be, the people who are shut in from their loved ones or not allowed to see them, the people sick with other diseases or injuries who are not allowed to see their family. I think we will look back on this as a very dark spot on the history of our country and culture.

I’d like to think more positive about “getting back to normal,” but I doubt that will happen. In some ways there might be some good that will come from what we’ve been through but that will only happen if people make real changes in their lives, permanent changes. You can probably think of a lot of examples for this. Will it happen? IDK. But I sure hope so.

Holy Mary, our hope and seat of wisdom, pray for us!

For anyone who has dealt with depression, either personally or with a loved one, this book is not only incredibly helpful but qualifies as excellent spiritual reading. You don’t have to be a theologian or priest to understand it. I am just finishing it and it has helped me with my own spiritual growth and helped me feel more positive than ever about my faith and the future.

Here is an excerpt from the description of the book.

Countless Christians � including scores of saints � have suffered profound, pervasive sorrow that modern psychiatrists call �depression.� Then, as now, great faith and even fervent spiritual practices have generally failed to ease this wearying desolation of soul.

In these pages, Catholic psychiatrist Aaron Kheriaty reviews the effective ways that have recently been devised to deal with this grave and sometimes deadly affliction � ways that are not only consistent with the teachings of the Church, but even rooted in many of those teachings.

You can find the book on Amazon in either paperback or Kindle versions.